


A Fleeting Light Similar To A Mirage

by Euriditia



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Afterlife, Angst, Depression, Despair, Love, Other, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:28:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24888367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Euriditia/pseuds/Euriditia
Summary: This story is dedicated to "I Wanna Be Your World" by Kz
Relationships: Bloodhound/Mirage | Elliott Witt
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	A Fleeting Light Similar To A Mirage

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning: This fic deals with some serious themes. The death of a loved one, depression, despair, and suicide. 
> 
> This is written from the perspective of BloodHound.

Disbelief, that was all they could feel when Ajay turned up at their doorstep completely soaked by the torrential rain storm that was happening. 

They barely registered her words, they only saw her lips move. They felt as if someone had taken a hot iron and was burning their insides. White noise filled their ears until Ajay shook them, her bronze eyes glimmered with unshed tears. She would not let them fall in front of them. 

Then like a tsunami wave everything was uprooted and smashed into broken pieces. The life that they had built together was now reduced to nothing. Unable to bear the weight of their emotions they fell to their knees, Ajay tried to hoist them back onto their feet but they remained motionless as they stared into the void.

* * *

It had been twelve months since that fated day that Elliott had left them. People told them the same mantra, 

“Time heals all wounds.” 

Lies, they were all bold faced lies. Every day they struggled to rouse themselves from what used to be their bed that they had shared. Why wake up when they could see him in their dreams? Living a life that was stolen from them. 

The Allfather was cruel, how could he bestow such a wretched fate upon them? Had they not been faithful? What had they done to deserve this punishment?

For the first time in their life they doubted the gods, because if they were real Elliott would still be with them. Not taken from them in a horrible car accident on his way home from work. 

They kept all the voicemails they had from him; he would just call to leave a silly message or an ‘I love you’. Words that they thought would always be spoken to them as they would grow old together. 

They lay in the now cold bed alone and play those messages over and over again. When it would become too much they would break down once more until they cried themselves to sleep hoping to see him again.

Friends would visit them often, to check up on them. They were worried and rightfully so. But today would be different. Today was the day that they were given the news that ruined their life twelve months ago; and it was time to take fate into their own hands.

* * *

It was a beautiful sunny day but they slept in until late afternoon. They admitted that they were now a shell of who they used to be; they ceased their love of the outdoors, of the hunt. They turned Artur loose, because he did not deserve the neglect that they knew would happen. But he always came to visit which had restored a drop of faith in the Allfather. 

They packed light because for this trip they would not need much; and as the sun started to set they left the house for the first time in a year. The gentle breeze kissed their face as they started to walk to what used to be Elliott’s favorite spot.

* * *

It didn’t take long to reach about twenty minutes from their home. It was a grassy hill that overlooked a valley but the sun would set perfectly amongst the trees. Memories that they had carefully locked away sprung free when they set their pack down. 

One of their very first dates was here, Elliott gaping at the sunset as the rays shone in his bouncy curls. It was then that they knew they were in love. 

This was also the place where they proposed to him, which he obviously accepted joyfully jumping into their arms. Ajay had been there in secret to capture the moment with her camera. 

Tears swelled in their eyes as those long forgotten fragments came to light, shards of what was true happiness. Something that they had not experienced since he left. 

A familiar weight found itself on their shoulder and when they looked over their feathered friend sat perched, whose head was cocked in curiosity. They offered their hand which Artur stepped onto and they reached up with the other hand to pat his chest. 

“Do not worry felagi, everything will be alright.” With those words, they raised their arm and Artur took off but stayed near them. 

They sank down onto their knees next to their pack and opened it. They lifted out a single polaroid picture of their love, it was taken on their honeymoon. They were on some tropical beach and enjoying life around a fire. It was a perfect photo, the moon reflected in Elliott’s eyes. 

He was so beautiful, so pure and full of life; and now all that remained were memories. Sometimes when the moon was full, they swore that during their more restless nights he was there. The moonlight shining over him as he smiled down at them, but when they reached out it was all fleeting similar to a mirage. 

They pressed the picture to their chest, allowing their tears to fall. How they had hoped that the tears would eventually fade and that they would heal; but that had never happened for them. The distance between them now was the invisible wall between life and death itself. 

After a moment they gently placed the picture beside them as they reached into the worn leather pack again and removed the second object. 

The dying sun’s rays glinted across the jeweled hilt of the dagger, it was what Elliott had given them for their first anniversary. Intricately designed and somewhat over the top, but he was so happy when they first held it. 

They steadied their shaking hands as they lifted it above their head towards the sky, the point aimed directly at their heart. 

“Elliott, please wait for me. I’ll be with you soon ástin mín.” They whispered as they watched the light dance across the jewels once more. 

‘Allfather if you are real, then let this be a final sacrifice. Let me be by his side again.’ The silent prayer was brief, then they plunged the dagger deep in their chest. 

They gasped or tried to, the burning metal and the pain were sudden but dulled quickly to an icy chill. They fell onto their side gasping as the far sky seemed to be collapsing and with their dying gaze towards the falling stars they saw a retreating figure amongst them. 

They reached out their hand to hold him and the magnificent shower of stardust suddenly cleared and became one. 

A warm hand cupped the side of their face and when they opened their eyes, he was there.

“Bloth?” He said breathlessly. With a shaking hand they reached up and touched the hand that rested against their cheek. 

“I am here Elliott… I am here. Let us never be apart.”

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was written in a very dark time for me. But in darkness there is light.


End file.
